At least 4 times a day I think of something that I should write about. The way life is here in daily life in Africa, how we are all the same but just a bit different, why does the world not just do everything the same, why Target is only in America and things of those nature. I think oh that would be great to write about and then about 15 minutes later I forget.
But one thing that keeps on coming back that I should write about is living in perspective. Right now I live in the perspective of hopefully coming back to visit San Diego and Spokane and all the in between places in about 4 months. Seriously after almost 2 years - Home has become a huge fantasy. I can just feel home in my brain, I can smell, I can taste it - oh need it and I so miss it. We need come home and see family and friends. Also for Nya and Analise to see grandparents and cousins and aunt and uncles and feel connected to our friends too.
But as I live here daily with those Home sensors always on... I can handle the no electricity, the leaking roof due to too much rain, being exposed to so much poverty that I can't help it all... and I can handle the small things that add up when you are not in your home country with the perspective that Home is close. When things are different than you are used to and you have to live everyday life in it you find yourself questioning everything? Why does blah, why does blah... It doesn't help you but you get a little bit more aggravated about it and you think you have the better way of handling it. But with the perspective that I am going home in a few months, I find myself going why ask why?... it is amazing with that perspective that i have patience for things that I didn't have earlier. With my eyes on the goal, (America) I can put up with the things that exhaust a foreigner. But i find myself living in the future than just rooting in and digging in the right here right now! I remind myself - right here - right now!
But funny when I think about this - it is deeper than just me. It is about me - looking forward to home- but really it should be me looking forward to Heaven my real home. It really is the same thing. My eyes are on the prize (Paul wrote about that in the bible) with Heaven being the prize.
It is different when an immigrant comes to a new land to make it home- really there is no looking back, there is just the promise of a new thing, a home that will be in home in that foreign land. But for me I always have the promise of the coming back to my home land as a missionary when I live in a foreign land, it is just the when am I coming back.
With that I need to be living with that same way - whose hope is in Heaven. And as a person who lives in the Shadow of eternity - the little things shouldn't bother me, shouldn't add up and wear on me. They do of course ( I haven't arrived at perfection) , but I still need to live in the here and now but with perspective of heaven right around the corner.
Anyways- just wanted to share deep thoughts with you... Lots of love- amy louise
1 comment:
amen!!!
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